Saturday, November 3, 2012
Week 11 discussion - Question 2
My best friend and I have invested so much in our friendship. Being friends since high school, the drama definitely tried to knock us down many times and we both have been caught up in petty fights. We've gotten through these things because we took the time to fix our problems and clear out rumors instead of just not being friends anymore. The trust was built after we both opened up to each other and it was rebuilt after our first "fight" when she confessed about what she did wrong to me instead of me just finding out through other people. This fight also helped me realize that even though my best friend has done wrong things and have flaws, I am also the same way and we're going to make mistakes in our lives. This realization has helped me accept her more, with flaws and all. Now, we both never have to front when it comes to our feelings and our wrongdoings with each other. Our closeness nowadays are mostly through dialogue since we are both busy with our own lives, but we do make the effort to do activities together when we are both free. I feel like after almost 7 years of friendship, my best friend and I have been consistent with the dynamics discussed in this chapter (except for the first year, which I call the "rough patch").
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Reading your post reminds me of a friend I once had. This girl and I had been friends since 6th grade, up until Junior year in college. This rumor got started, and she believed the other person instead of me. Of course this hurt me, because we had been friends for so long. We had been through maybe two petty arguments before that I can recall, but none of those arguments every distanced us, the way this rumor did. Once she found out the rumor was fake, our friendship never got back to the way it was. Reading your post made me wish that our friendship would have been like yours and your best friends. But like they say, everything happens for a reason.
ReplyDeleteI really do believe that some friendships cannot be repaired. There are times where the gash is too deep even if you stop the blood there is a scar left in its place. As children when we fight and hurt each other after we make up it is as if there wasn't a fight at all to begin with. As you get older, those gashes get harder and harder to repair. A lot of the he said she said gets in the way and there is no longer a direct line of communication. I've had my fair share of big fights with friends. Often times there was a he said she said involved because I actually had a fake friend whom I confided in. Anything I said to her would be warped so that it would hurt my other friend. Basically she was jealous of how easily I earn people's trust and liking that she would purposely say things to make me look like a fake. For example, I loved my friends art and I would always comment on it and admire her works. My fake friend would then tell her behind my back that I am copying her art at home and trying to recreate her art. Thus would cause a high fight because it is not true and I was simply admiring her art. I really wish that the fake friend didn't ruin our relationship because she is now a fairly successful fashion designer for a big company.
ReplyDeleteI have the same sort of relationship with my best friend. We have been friends for almost 8 years now. Even though it is hard to hang out or do things together on a daily basis, we do manage to find time within our busy schedules to do something together every once in a while. It is great to see other people that have been friends since high school and continue to remain friends today. My best friend is probably one of the only people that I knew in high school that I still talk to today. I enjoyed reading your post and am glad that you have a good relationship with your best friend.
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